“We brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content.” (1 Timothy 6:7-8)
My heart longs for a secret place. Specifically, a home tucked away from the world with a back porch overlooking nature where I can study the Word and marvel at God’s creation. A home on enough land to house my parents later in life. A place of solitude. Not cut from a stencil and squeezed along an assembly line of other homes, overlooking the construction of yet another building.
This desire has stirred in my heart for 11 years, and only grows stronger the older I get. One morning I was reading Deuteronomy 9:5, which says, “Not because of your righteousness or the uprightness of your heart are you going in to possess their land, but because of the wickedness of these nations the Lord your God is driving them out from before you, and that he may confirm the word that the Lord swore to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob.”
This example of the Lord’s faithfulness and goodness encouraged my heart. The Israelites did not acquire the promised land because they deserved it, but because God is true to His word. In my prayer journal entry that morning I made a request. I told God I knew I was not promised land like the Israelites. But if He would allow us to obtain it through His generosity, I would proclaim His goodness to all who will listen. If not, I asked Him to help me to be content.
That night I found a house for sale. Never mind that I should not have been on a real estate website looking. This house checked all the boxes. The structure of the house was not my favorite and a few projects would be necessary to make it pretty. But on paper this house made sense. To my surprise, both my husband Jon and our realtor thought it could be a good buy. We scheduled a showing.
Jon and I decided we would wait on the Lord for confirmation and not try to make this decision alone. All week, I was on the lookout to hear from God, but any potential signs I may have seen contradicted one another. Walking into the showing, neither of us sensed what God’s will was yet.
We walked the property. It was beautiful. There were a few things not shown in the listing though. The sugar sand driveway, carpet-imbedded lawn, old rusty gym set and external house wiring would all need to be attended to. This did not sway our interest, we were ok with a little cleanup if it meant we could ask for a lower price.
Upon entering the house, we discovered it was also not as pictured. This move-in-ready home was actually a fixer-upper. Jon and I are not able to do big renovation projects, so we would need to hire out. The owner was ready to sell, so that may have been a negotiation point. But after days of requesting quotes and number crunching, I realized this house was not meant for us. I did not have peace. I tried to make it work because it checked the boxes, but a fixer-upper was more than we bargained for.
“There was not a needy person among them, for as many as were owners of lands or houses sold them and brought the proceeds of what was sold and laid it at the apostles' feet, and it was distributed to each as any had need.”( Acts 4:34-35)
One of the signs I received on this goose chase, the only real sign, was a women’s luncheon message on Psalm 23:1. It says, The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. My pastor’s wife spoke of our calling to sacrifice our worldly desires in order to lead a righteous life. Whether it is a house, career, comfortable life or new purse we should be willing to pass it up for the sake of following God’s will. Over the years she has discovered, true followers of Christ are often not well off and endure much suffering in their lifetime. This is not a blanket statement for all Christians, God knows the individual heart and how to tame it to become like His. But looking back at her message, I knew it was meant for me.
God brought me that house, not to buy but to learn. Like Thomas, whom is known for believing after touching Jesus’ wounds after the resurrection, I required a visual. I needed to experience for myself the reality of the situation. Through this experience, God said, This is what it will look like if I give you property now. Do you really want this, or do you want to wait? Once we decided to pass on the house, I felt this huge sense of relief and thankfulness. I started to see the easy yoke God has given me in my current home.
I have so much to learn about contentment, but what I do know is if God has not called you to it, it is not good.
In 1 Timothy 6:7-8 The apostle Paul sets the standard for the essentials of the Christian. The list is terribly short with only food and clothing listed. If food and clothing are all I truly need in this world, aside from the presence of the Lord, then I am lavished! I am surrounded by luxury. Every day I have the privilege of enjoying amenities that many pray for around the world. May my heart be humbled and praise God who has provided faithfully.
I may not have an abundance of property or privacy but I am rich in the love of God. He is the one thing my heart truly desires and the only one that satisfies. He is my secret place.
Remember to prioritize firsthand Bible reading every day, only the Word has the power to transform. "All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work."2 Timothy 3:16-17 ESV
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